Don't say you weren't warned by the title of this one that today's entry is a little, um, unfocused...but hopefully entertaining none-the-less!
As I do every morning, today I am perched on my sofa, with a tea beside me as I peruse my daily news on-line. In the background I have The Today Show on the TV and the story they're currently covering is about a little chihuahua that was impaled with a BBQ fork in his brain. The owner is soooo southern that I cannot understand a single word he is saying. Now, I've been schooled in the language of the south, what with having spent way too many years living in Atlanta. With enough vodka, wine or beer in me I can channel my inner-southern-belle, so yeah, generally speaking understanding people from south of the Mason-Dixon Line is usually not an issue for me. But this guy? This guy, in addition to being very southern, obviously has marbles in his mouth - or maybe it's a pinch of "chew" in his cheek - I'm not sure which. But the long and short of it, the dog survived - had the fork removed from his brain - ugh, the visuals on this story were not what you'd want to be looking at over your morning muffin, is all I can say.
As I sit here typing away the large dog is laying in a sunbeam at my feet. The sun is out now...but at 6 o'clock this morning, not only was the sun not out, but it was storming again and that was enough to send this 50-lb wuss flying into our bed, shaking and quivering at the sound of yet another thunder storm. Oh, and now that the storm's over and he's calmed down? He stinks. It's a residual left over from his stress attacks. He gets so wound up with nerves that he gets the dog equivalent of B.O. Not very pleasant at this hour of the day and it will likely take the balance of the day to dust the smell off him. In the meantime, I'm going to spray a dose of my perfume on him!
Yesterday, I was stepping into the shower and as I am want to do I took a cursory glance out of the upstairs bathroom window where what to my wondering eyes did I see? That's right a whole flock of Mo-Fo ravens sitting in a tree gorging themselves on our newly ripening cherries! The day before I had taken great pains to string pie plates throughout the tree's branches in the hopes that the clanging sound of the tin plates blowing through the wind would discourage those fucking birds from eating our cherries. I was wrong. This is when, I believe, I first channeled my inner-crazy lady. I whipped up the window and stuck my head out of it and with all the might I could muster I screamed "Get out of my tree you Mo-Fos!" Except that I didn't use the (somewhat) polite abbreviation. No, I used the full, nasty, potty-mouthed mother-f**king word. My mother would not be proud. My husband would not be surprised because I have been on a mission to rid our yard of both pigeons and ravens since we got to the island and I don't think I'll win the battle unless he lets me have a shotgun. Which he won't. I don't think we are ever going to enjoy a cherry from that tree - there are way more ravens in the OBB then I have pie-plates.
Today, when I checked my email I had a message from a friend who often sends me little tidbits she finds on-line...interesting articles, websites, newsletters and such. Today she forwarded a newsletter called "Goop" with an article that poses the question: “What does it take to sustain a happy and successful relationship or marriage?” As we approach our one-year anniversary next month, the timing of this little newsletter couldn't have been better. I love that my friends, no matter how near or far, keep me in their thoughts and when something strikes them that Kim might like this and then they send it to me? Well, it makes being stranded on this island just a little more bearable. Thank you Bella!, my faithful reader and even better friend, for keeping me in your thoughts!
Yesterday I wrote about the joy of a butter tart...and more specifically the new recipe I discovered for Butter Tart Muffins. They were so good that the one whom I adore took a couple to snack on with his afternoon coffee. It always tickles me when I find something new that he loves...which clearly he did, because this is the email I got yesterday afternooon:
I’m having a butter tart muffin and it is ABSOLUTELY FREAKING FANTASTIC. There is no way I’m stopping at just one. As tempted as I am to show-off your baking there is no way I’m sharing. Here goes muffin #2.
He even asked for two more to take to work today - very sweet, but not as sweet as those damn muffins!
I haven't been off our property since Monday, so today? Today I'm venturing to town...to (wait for it)...Walmart! Yes, it's a big day here in the OBB. I hope yours is nearly half as exciting as mine will be!
