I wasn't sure I would be able to pull this off. After all, I never went to college, so how was I qualified to teach anything to anyone? Well, it's not the first time I've taken on a job I didn't think I was qualified for and just like that last time when I went to work for a big hotel company, I put my shoulder to the grindstone and just kept pushing through.
I pushed through hours of speaking to a group of people that would rather have had to peel 10,000 potatoes than sit through one more lecture about the alluring 3 x 3 writing process. I pushed through the arrogance of some of the students who felt that by simply showing up and paying $10,000 they should get an automatic pass, regardless of the quality of work they produced. I pushed through having to chase students down to submit their assignments. I had to push through those that demanded a "do over" because they didn't get a perfect grade the first time. I pushed through the moments of self-doubt that left me wondering who was really there to learn; them or me? I pushed through days when I thought I wasn't getting through to them at all. I pushed through. And through. And through.
Some days I would come home feeling as though the very life had been sucked out of my veins. Days when the very thought of doing anything other than lying in a soggy heap on the sofa was more than I could imagine. Days when I wondered whether I was really giving them anything of any value. After all, they wanted to learn how to cook - so how do you make Business Communications exciting to that group? How do you make it relevant? Interesting? Meaningful. I lost a lot of sleep over that one. I worked hard to find meaningful ways to reach them.
Toward the end of the contract I learned the most important lesson of my teaching career and it is this: It isn't a reflection of my worth if these guys passed or failed. It was a reflection of the students and their willingness to learn. I could facilitate the discussion. I could be available to help them before, during and after class. I could encourage good work and redirect those veering the wrong way. But at the end of the day, it would be up to THEM if they passed or failed, not me.
The day I learned this lesson was day I entered their final grades and realized that all but two passed with high marks. The two that failed had also failed to show up to half the classes; failed to hand in assignments when due or at all; failed to participate in classroom discussions; failed to succeed because they thought the world owed them something. I wonder how long it will take them to learn the lesson that real life doesn't work that way?
